I had my baby! She'll be 3 weeks old tomorrow, and I'm loving being a mom.
Unfortunately last week I was diagnosed with a uterine infection and had to have surgery. Before the surgery I was feeling really great. I had energy, thanks to the newborn-sleepy state of my baby, I felt strong and was able to do a lot of the household tasks I would normally do, like keep the house clean, etc. The baby likes taking naps in her carrier, so that helped a lot too.
However, after the surgery I've been a lot worse off than I was before. The nurse at the hospital told me to take stairs carefully, and not take the baby up and down the stairs. (We live in a 2 story townhome) I've really had to rely on my husband. He has been so wonderful, while we were in the hospital he took care of the baby almost entirely, and would just bring her to me to eat. Whenever I need to go downstairs I have to have his help bringing the baby down the stairs. He works from home which has been a huge blessing, but it's still hard for me to not be able to do certain things.
I've had to learn how to let him help me. I'm one that likes to just do everything myself. I don't want to be an inconvenience to anyone else. Even now, I'm feeling much better and stronger, but I have to keep taking it easy until I have a follow up appointment with my doctor and am given the all-clear. It's hard for me to be feeling alright, but still not be able to do certain things.
I told my husband that there is no way I could do this without him, and it's entirely true. I hope I can start taking over some of the household tasks soon, but until then I just have to rely on, and accept his service to me.
So, what about you? Do you accept service well? Or are you a do-it-yourself-er? I think accepting service gracefully is something we could all improve on.
4 comments:
I agree. I think we could all be better at accepting service. I tend to accept it from family better than neighbors or friends but I realize now that if I don't accept service and let people serve me, then I am keeping us all from the blessings that come from service. I'm so glad to hear that you and baby are good. Congratulations!! Being a mom is the best and hardest job in my opinion.
Oh my goodness Sara. I've been SO behind on reading blogs that I had no idea and now I feel like a crappy friend! Seriously, if you need anything let me know. I'm always just a text away! I know you have family here, but if ever you need a break, want some company, need a toilet cleaned or dinner, please let me know! And I'm holding you to it since this post is about accepting service! :)
Onto your questions. I'm not good at accepting service. When I had my baby it was fine to have members of the ward bring us dinner for a week because that's what the ward does, but other than that I didn't accept much help. While I was pregnant I was miserably sick and housework was the least of my worries which I guess is a nice way of saying our house probably could have made the show Hoarders... or Clean House! There were times the dishes stacked up until there were no dishes to use and the smell coming from the kitchen was so strong I couldn't even go downstairs! Ha! The hard part was during the first trimester which was by far the worst of it and nobody knew we were pregnant so service wasn't offered. But even if it was I don't think I would have accepted the help because I couldn't bare the thought of someone seeing how disgusting our kitchen got.
Since then it's made me more empathetic towards pregnant women and as soon as I find out someone is pregnant I offer to help them with whatever they need. I know how hard it is to make dinner when all you want to do is puke and cleaning the kitchen after is even worse. So far nobody has taken me up on my offers... probably for the same reason I never would have taken the offer had I of had any so here are some questions...
How persistent do we need to be in offering service? Would showing up on their doorstep with some cleaning supplies be rude? Do we just take no for an answer and leave it at that?
Good thoughts Sara! and don't feel bad that you didn't know. ;) I didn't exactly advertise.
To answer your questions though, I think it is totally appropriate to show up on someone's doorstep with cleaning supplies or a meal. Sometimes the service has to be staring you in the face before you'll accept it. I also think it's nice to offer a specific thing, like ask someone, "when can I bring you dinner?" instead of "what can I do for you?" that way they don't have to ask you for help.
I also think it's probably a lot easier to accept service from family members than from friends. I'm not sure why, but I think I'm that way!
YIKES!! I'm glad you got taken care of!
Yes, I think we can all be better about accepting service. I think people do it because they don't want to seem selfish, but how is it NOT selfish to allow others the opportunity to receive blessings?
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